Like most women I think babies are cute & I oooh and ahhh at them when they are especially adorable. I mean as long as they aren't barfing on me or having a blow out diaper situation they tend to cause my uterus to ache a bit. Sometimes I think, "No way Amy, that will be waaaaaaay too crazy... just wait a bit longer, until you think you're really ready to give up your entire life." and then I snuggle with a sweet baby and I think, "Hey, you could do this. Maybe you could do it and be great at it. Just maybe."
I think about becoming a mother a lot. I think it's mostly because there are SO many things that go into the decision of becoming a parent and I am the type of person that wants to know as much as possible about what I'm getting myself into. Not that I expect to be able to predict all possible situations, but I do want to be as prepared as possible. And mostly, I feel that at some point I should be mentally ready for the idea of dedicating my entire life, body & home to my child.
For now I'm really enjoying the fact that Tyler and I can pretty much do whatever we want whenever we want, a luxury I'm sure I'll miss when children enter the picture. And although the aching in my uterus is usually caused by spending time with my pregnant friends & family or their children, I also really like being able to spend time with said friends and family without having to worry about a baby. Then that last thought makes me feel like a bad person... like having a baby is torture or something?
Yes, I know I really know nothing about being a parent, but watching people I know go through parenthood helps me get a glimpse of the way life could be. It seems to me that the good simply continues to weigh out the bad. Plus, I really don't think many things are better than snuggling with my sweet niece and she alone has made my uterus ache more than any other child has. I love her SO much I can't even imagine how much I will love my own little pumpkin someday.
The way her hand is holding my arm just melts my heart. Seriously. I love her.
*picture of me and my niece Brylee at our cousin Justin's mission farewell lunch